Insignificance
Sometimes the most fascinating thing about celebrity is not so much what the actual person is like in real life, but rather instead the PERCEPTION of said celebrity from the point of view of the general public, based in many ways upon the image that they have of the celeb from their acting roles and / or public appearances without having much of a real idea who the human being him or herself is all about. This can lead to impersonators and homage artists of these same celebrities basing their performances on that so called perception rather than the real person whom theyâve probably never even met. Countless movies and TV shows have portrayed famous real life figures working from these perceptions and little else, but arguably the most blatant example was this 1985 release from esoteric director Nicolas Roeg which was based on a London stage play of the early 80s. The concept (fictitious though it is) sounds like a canât miss in terms of character development and acting: what if the four most famous (or infamous as it would be) public figures of the 1950s actually managed to all cross paths with each other on a single given night and in the same hotel room no less? Add to this the fact that 3 out of the 4 leads are all acting heavyweights in their own right and then it seems even more of a guaranteed sure thing to at least be a somewhat good movie. For legal reasons (obvious or otherwise), none of the four iconic main characters are ever identified directly by name in the movie nor are they listed as such in the credits, instead being identified by the roles in life that they were most known for, thus giving us castwise Theresa Russell as âThe Actressâ (Marilyn Monroe), Gary Busey as âThe Ballplayerâ (Joe DiMaggio, a.k.a. Monroeâs husband), Tony Curtis as âThe Senatorâ (Sen. Joseph McCarthy) and Michael Emil as âThe Professorâ (Albert Einstein). It goes without saying that Emil as Einstein is the odd man out here, a little known and barely traveled actor stranded amongst his more renowned co stars and the performance itself turns out to be terrible as well with Emil playing Einstein all while sporting a screwy Brooklyn accent and spending much of his screen time giggling and nodding as his co stars get to do most of the heavy lifting. Itâs like watching Albert Einstein being done by way of Gabe (Welcome Back Kotter) Kaplan. And whatâs even worse is that he gets more screentime than anyone else here, positioned as the key figure that the other three characters revolve around. The film opens with Russellâs Monroe on the set of The Seven Year Itch, in fact while filming the legendary scene where her white dress is blown upwards by the winds in the sewer duct. In a great bit of random happenstance, this opening scene is dominated by the two crew members situated in the sewer underneath who are operating the giant fan as they argue about who gets to be in position to look up Marilynâs dress, again reflecting the absolute truth about Monroeâs run in that she was definitely NOT the only beautiful girl with a great body in those days (nor was she a literal goddess as these two guys seem to think) and that much of her rise to fame was based more on her being in the right place at the right time. Monroe leaves the set seemingly disgusted with herself as usual (and also leaving behind hubby Buseyâs DiMaggio who bitterly goes to get drunk for over half the movie) and after making a couple of stops, winds up going to the hotel where Einstein is staying at (Why does she go there? How does she know that is where Einstein is staying??) apparently to meet and engage in conversation with him about relativity and other such things. Sadly, literally the whole entire first half of the movie is Monroe and Einstein just sitting there talking endlessly, something that seems cute at first but then becomes more akin to watching paint dry. After Monroe finally gets around to telling Einstein that she finds him sexy and tries to get him into bed, suddenly Buseyâs DiMaggio shows up demanding to see his wife which at the very least helps to liven things up a bit with Buseyâs usually blunt acting style in play here as he explains to Einstein the various health issues which Monroe apparently suffers from (including her inability to have a child due to internal damage caused by excessive promiscuity) and repeatedly tells his wife Marilyn that itâs time to go home as Einstein stands idly by not sure what to do. As for Curtis as McCarthy, he gets shafted worse than anybody else storywise, drunkenly paying Einstein a visit early on to inform him that his subpoena to testify before the House Un-American Activities Committee is valid and that itâs in his best interest to do so, only for Curtis to spend the entire middle portion of the film cavorting with a prostitute in his own hotel room (and having a long crying fit afterwards) before showing up in the morning again looking for Einstein but finding Monroe instead, withstanding a seduction attempt on her part before cruelly punching her in the stomach (itâs no secret that McCarthy is not a particularly popular figure to this day, but this movie seems to suggest that he is possibly sexually repressed or maybe even a closet homosexual). The real innovation here though was in the use of flashbacks throughout the movie for all four characters, usually mixed in with any number of the main dialogue scenes and usually shown while the characters are in the middle of talking amongst themselves (i.e., the flashbacks themselves are silent and thus visual only) with their major revelations including Monroeâs abuse suffered while in a foster home and later when breaking into Hollywood and the possibility (not directly shown for obvious reasons) that McCarthy as a boy was molested by a pedophile priest which might help to explain his issues both sexual and political. But the most fascinating piece of buried insight might belong to Einstein: Since much of his theoretical work was used in the development of the atomic bomb, Einstein has always been harboring enormous amounts of guilt and even a crippling fear of whatâs to come in the future since heâs convinced that sooner or later after Hiroshima and Nagasaki, mankind will once again be compelled to utilize nuclear weapons which in turn will result in the end of mankind itself, a grim possibility which he personally feels âresponsibleâ for. However, much of this is conveyed through Roegâs own directorial abilities (including a simulated blast that sees Marilyn get fried into a crispy critter) and not through the actor Emilâs overly passive, near sleepwalking performance. Out of the four of them, it is perhaps Busey who shines the most, with his DiMaggio not asserting himself until late in the movie but when doing so, taking much of the general publicâs (and Marilynâs) viewpoint of him as being a big dumb athlete and turning it on its ear, exhibiting a more thoughtful, sensitive side that belies the revelation that he truly does love his wife Marilyn despite her countless transgressions even as he knows and accepts the fact that its time for the marriage to come to an end mostly for his own piece of mind and well being (notwithstanding the real DiMaggioâs near monstrous obsession with Monroe almost all the way up to the end of her life not the least of which included keeping surveillance and outright stalking her which he was able to get away with because of his image as an American baseball hero, something that at one point is rightfully noted here). Russell as Monroe is just merely good, not over the top clichĂ© but not exactly super authentic either, filling the requirements of the role when it comes to both the look and vocal patterns of Monroe yet finding much of her performanceâs impact diluted by the quagmire of the endless one on one dialogue scenes between her and Emilâs Einstein. That leaves Curtis as McCarthy, getting the short end of the stick in more ways than one as his Commie hating Senator seems to be the most obvious case of character writing based upon (negative) perception of him by film industry types (or rather, We Hate This Guy Anyway For What He Did In Real Life So Letâs Make Him Out To Be A Piece Of Shit Here), a sweaty, bloated drunk who will rant and rave to total strangers (and Einstein) about just how bad the Communists are and upon finally encountering Marilyn, goes into denial and thinks that sheâs just a hooker made up to look like her instead. Unfortunately, the whole thing goes on for too long and to little purpose, but judging by the filmâs title, maybe that was the whole point to begin withâŠ
5/10